I work across the street from a 7-11. Sometimes, when I’m still hungry in the early afternoon because I didn’t quite bring enough to eat at lunch, I look out the window and see the 7-11 beckoning me like the Emperor in Return of the Jedi.
7-11: “Give in to your hunger. With each passing moment you make yourself more my servant. Soon your journey towards the dark side will be complete!”
Me: “Never. I’ll never turn to the Dark Side!”
(Five minutes later)
(Five minutes later)
Me: “One quarter-pound big bite hot dog on white, please.”
I learned the hard way about the hot wings, nice and dried out after hours under the heat lamp. Once those little assassins reach your stomach, they break out Samuel L. Jackson’s Ezekiel 25:17 speech from Pulp Fiction and “strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger.”
Learn from my mistakes. I recommend not buying your lunch at 7-11. Your digestive system will never forgive you if you do.
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